THIEVES!!!

The other day I was on a trip through town.
I always take the same route.
*boring jin!*
I decide to mix it up a bit & take Washington Street.
I never take Washington Street.
*anal-retentive jin!*
I'm stuck waiting at a busy intersection for the light to change.
Instead of dwelling on sex and/or chocolate
*or a jincombo of the 2!*
I decide to try and focus in on a billboard up the street.

Hmmm....what's that in the top picture?
It looks like it could be something chocolate!



Yummy, I think to myself.
What kind of chocolate is it, I wonder.



*GASP!*
But, but, but...
THAT looks just like my Oblivion!
Someone is trying to rip me off!!!
What does it say?
All I could see was this:



CO
?
CO?
First thing that pops into my head is
a local Coldstone Creamery outlet.
I know they make frozen cakes
(that I would never personally eat. ever. :-P)
The bastards!
They are trying to copy my dessert!!!
As the light turns to green
and my eyes turn to red
*danger! danger! possible jinplosion!*
I drive towards it slowly.



*GASP!*
The Courthouse Pub?
YAY! The Courthouse Pub!!!
It IS my Oblivion!!!
I make them FOR The Courthouse Pub!!!

As I flip the bird to the jerk honking behind me
I am finally able to appreciate the billboard in its entirety:



Ahhh....Love at First Sight
Now isn't that RIGHT!
:-D

Sex & Chocolate in the Pastry Shoppe

I love my commenters. You all know that, right?!
You make me laugh, cry & everything in between!
East Village Idiot left a comment last post that reminded me of this story.
Enjoy!

On a slightly dreary afternoon I saw a van pull up outside. A well dressed, middle aged couple got out & walked in. She looked like a Disco Diva that stepped right out of the 70's...skin-tight black pants, ultra low-cut purple top over her well-toned curves, a super short fur jacket, perfectly applied shimmery make-up & to top it all off, a shorter curled & teased 'do. He was clean cut, well manicured & dressed to the nines in a dark gray suit.

I invited them into the front room & asked what I could help them with. They both started grinning & giggling. I felt a substantial amount of energy emanating from them...exactly what type of energy I wasn't sure of.....yet. They took turns sharing the story of their first taste of my Flourless Chocolate Oblivion at a local restaurant.

One started a sentence while the other finished, with tremendous amounts of electrical eye contact & shared deep throated giggles in between. They enjoyed my Oblivion so much, that they ate at the same restaurant the next evening for the sole purpose of sharing the dessert again. They said together, "We just had to see where it came from. It was divine! Tell us all about it!"

The more I talked, the more they giggled. I have never been in the same room with two individuals who emanated sex energy more than these two beings. All of a sudden I was giggling & I could feel it getting hot in the room, I mean really hot!

They wanted a brochure but I was fresh out. I offered to mail them one. He explained that they lived in different states & just came to visit our little town once a year together. (Ok, I think...so they aren't husband & wife. Hmmm...) I mention that the Oblivions are indeed shippable, in case they are interested. His eyes lit up instantly!

He- "Ohhh...why don't we have her ship us each one!" *deep throaty sexy giggle*
She- *deep throaty sexy giggle* "Ohhh...really??? You would have her do that?"
Me- "Sure! I can do that, just tell me where you'd like them sent & for what day."
He- "We'll both be back on Wednesday.....will we receive them on the same day?"
Me- "Yes, I can make sure you do."
She- (to him) "I'll call you when I get mine....." *deep throaty sexy giggle*
He- ".....we can eat them together....." *deep throaty sexy giggle*
She- *deep throaty sexy giggle* ".....mmmmm while we are on the phone....."
He- ".....oh yeah!" *deep throaty sexy giggle*
Me- "Um...I'll go get something to write your addresses on."

I stand in the kitchen for a moment to cool down. D tells me my face is all red. We hear more giggling from the front room. When I go back in they are standing close together with sparkling eyes & the shared aura of two people in love (or lust?). I take their names & addresses (funny, they both had the same last name?), total their order & he pays by credit card. I promise to ship them out the following week. They glow even more (I didn't think that was possible!?) & thank me for my time.

On the way out I hear him ask her if she'd like to eat at that restaurant again this evening. She replies, "Only if we can have that dessert again!"

The van sat out front for a while before they drove away. No, I don't know why.....I was too busy getting D a large slice of Oblivion. ;-)

Ingredient 101 "Flourless Chocolate Oblivion Cake"

My bestseller, by far, is the dessert that I create with the least amount of ingredients. Know what else? It tastes the BEST! ;-)

Callebaut Belgian Bittersweet Chocolate Coins
(Your cake is only as good as your chocolate! Use the BEST!)


Wüthrich European Style Unsalted Butter
(Nothing else will suffice! You need the higher butterfat content for smoothness.)


Farm Fresh Eggs from Humpty Dumpty
(Need I say anything more??? Their eggs ROCK!)

That's it!
Really miss jin?
Yes, really!
AMAZING...isn't it?!!?


Smooth... warm... chocolate & butter.


Whipped...frothy... whole eggs.


Baking it in a bain-marie is IMPERATIVE!
Then it tastes like the center of a chocolate truffle!!!


Cool & chill for at least 8 hours.....if you can wait that long.


Precut, then decorated with piped chocolate & Belgian bittersweet lace.

Above is my favourite way to indulge in this phenomenal culinary masterpiece. A slice of oblivion floating in a pool of Crème Anglaise & served with organically grown sweet delicate tulips. The Verdict? My sultry mélange fills your palate with a stunningly jintastic oralgasmic feat of BLISS that will turn you into my slave for all eternity.

Who's brave enough to go first?